Surely I'm Not the Pessimist

This post was going to be about the challenge of dealing with difficult people. Specifically, you were going to hear about a client who has nothing good to say even though all my other clients offer regular compliments and expressions of gratitude. This person occupies too much of my mental energy because I'm trying to figure out why he's so unhappy with my services. My initial reaction is to make conjectures about his own character defects--he's a pessimist, he's never happy, he's too controlling, and so on.

Sadly, as I started to write the post I realized that this client's negative attitude is entirely in my head. While it is true that he has nothing good to say, it is also true that he has nothing bad to say either. In fact, never has a negative word come through his mouth or emails. Instead there are simply benign emails of "Can you give me an update on [blank]?"

Since there is a vacuum of words (compliments, actually) I fill it up with my own negativity. My fears come through in the pessimism that I imagine must be brewing within the client's mind. "He's disappointed with my services." "He thinks I should be doing more." "He knows I suck." Without the compliments my ego isn't being babied and I start distorting the reality of my interaction with the client while totally disregarding the kind words offered by other clients.

Spirituality has helped me see this situation more clearly. Spirituality allowed me to take a step back to see that I'm creating a problem, not the client. Without my own negativity, no negativity exists in the relationship. It is my character defects that need to be brought to the forefront of my consciousness then addressed. I don't care to admit my flaws, but it is the only way to live more deeply.

Can anyone relate?